Skippydale (SNS) - The Skippydale Education Authority today announced a new Public-Private Partnership in conjunction with the Infex Latex Company.
"We don't generally go in for public-privates" began Chairperson Steve, "They seem so American. We like our education one-tier. We can't have some kids learning to read while others fail, you know.
"But with the overwhelming success of our Primary Grades Sexual Education program, we have seen a certain rise in Nap-time Related Infectivity, and felt it was the right time to act."
Beginning in January, schools will make available the new product, free of charge, to students from kindergarten through grade two.
"We recognize the value in providing your children with usable information about sex and relationships, in an age-appropriate fashion. Now, we have made the additional progress of providing them with prophylactics that are size-appropriate".
Adorned with familiar and non-threatening cartoon characters, such as Wee Willie Winkie, the new PeeWee brand condoms bear the slogan "Big Fun for Little Scamps" and boast dimensions of two inches long by two fifths of an inch wide.
"They're only going to do it anyway. They grow up so fast these days".