Monday, December 05, 2005

More Footie

Tom at Donegal Express has taken issue with my post on soccer.

Relying on ambiguous texts, he has built a case for Baseball. You should read his post. It's funny. Wrong, but funny.

Thankfully, Holy Scripture is not silent on the subject of sport. It is so much more explicit than Tom would have you think.

It is at first unclear which of hockey or soccer the Almighty prefers, but Ezekiel tells us that the Lord plays one of them:
(32:3) "thus saith the Lord God: I will spread out my net".

Then the Psalms tip the scales in favour of hockey:
(10:10) "In his net he will bring him down" against the boards, he will check him. And as I explained in my post on hockey, this only makes sense.

But being as Galilee is warm, Jesus' Apostles couldn't play hockey, so they amused themselves with soccer right up until Jesus called them, whereupon "they immediately leaving their nets, followed him" (Mt 4:20).

Baseball, on the other hand, has no net. Neither has American Football. That's just unnatural. "For without cause they have hidden their net for me unto destruction" (ps 34:7).

In the Old Testament, bad people play baseball: (Gen 4:8) "And when they were in the field, Cain rose up against his brother Abel, and slew him".

And it's not just baseball that's unnatural. Deuteronomy list a whole lot of unclean things including, "the hoop also and the bat" (14:18). Which rules out basketball as well as baseball.

So what did Jesus like to do when all the equipment was put away after a good game? It's like He said to Peter "let down your nets for a draught" (Lk 5:4).

What more do you need?

1 comment:

Thomas Shawn said...

Yes hockey also has its own version penance. Reference: the penalty box into which players go for a designated period of time.

This was pointed out by the guys over at Traditio in Radice.